After about eight years of lactation, I get a lot of questions about weaning. However, three of my four kidlets are still nursing, and the one who did wean did so because she hated the taste of colostrum (she stopped nursing a few months after turning four). So I really don't feel particularly qualified to answer.
About a year ago I wrote a post on breastfeeding older children that remains the one with the highest number of views on my blog. Now that I might soon be nursing a six year old, I thought I would share my thoughts on our journey.
When I first embraced the idea of child led weaning, I told myself that I wasn't going to set a cut off point. But in my head, three or four sounded about right (this was, of course, after getting over the shocking idea of nursing past a year!). I had heard stats about an average age for weaning being around four years old, and I thought I could live with that.
So I nursed through one pregnancy, began tandem nursing, battled through nursing aversion and found my rhythm. My oldest weaned a couple of months before our third child was born. Those two months are the only time when my son was the only nursling! Tandeming was much easier the second time around, and we have been triandeming for a year and a half now.
I sort of expected my son to wean when he was four, but he didn't. Nor when he turned five. Now we are closing in on six, and I am wondering again just how long he will decide to nurse. The funny thing is that, for all I know, he may have weaned already.
My three year old still nurses at least once a day, the baby probably six or seven times, and my five year old about once every three or four weeks. Since nearly a month goes by between the times he asks to nurse, I wonder if he has already stopped or if in a week or two or four he will ask to nurse again.
By around two years or so, we are firmly in the don't ask, don't refuse stage. By three or so, I have been known to refuse if I was uncomfortable or tired. There have been many times when his sisters have already each nursed fully on their sides, and I have asked him to wait awhile. I have been glad to see his independence growing. I also have known/known of several others who weaned at six or seven years of age, including my father in law, a respected pastor. I can say with confidence that breastfeeding that long didn't cause any issues, and in fact contributed significantly to overall physical, mental and emotional health.
Many of our friends have had special celebrations, like a cake or weaning party to mark such a special milestone. Years ago, I thought that we would do that. But it seems to be working out as a much quieter, gradual process. I suspect that I won't really know for sure that he has weaned until I look back a few months later. Or, he may decisively determine that he is done. Who knows?
I am still wondering exactly what weaning an older child will look like. But mostly, I am just thankful that we have been able to share such a special time for these last six years. I don't know if he will remember it or not as he grows older, but I know that I will never forget the smile in his eyes as he nursed, the giggles from nursing his toys, the contentment of snuggling together and the full heart of my sweet little boy.
About a year ago I wrote a post on breastfeeding older children that remains the one with the highest number of views on my blog. Now that I might soon be nursing a six year old, I thought I would share my thoughts on our journey.
When I first embraced the idea of child led weaning, I told myself that I wasn't going to set a cut off point. But in my head, three or four sounded about right (this was, of course, after getting over the shocking idea of nursing past a year!). I had heard stats about an average age for weaning being around four years old, and I thought I could live with that.
So I nursed through one pregnancy, began tandem nursing, battled through nursing aversion and found my rhythm. My oldest weaned a couple of months before our third child was born. Those two months are the only time when my son was the only nursling! Tandeming was much easier the second time around, and we have been triandeming for a year and a half now.
I sort of expected my son to wean when he was four, but he didn't. Nor when he turned five. Now we are closing in on six, and I am wondering again just how long he will decide to nurse. The funny thing is that, for all I know, he may have weaned already.
My three year old still nurses at least once a day, the baby probably six or seven times, and my five year old about once every three or four weeks. Since nearly a month goes by between the times he asks to nurse, I wonder if he has already stopped or if in a week or two or four he will ask to nurse again.
By around two years or so, we are firmly in the don't ask, don't refuse stage. By three or so, I have been known to refuse if I was uncomfortable or tired. There have been many times when his sisters have already each nursed fully on their sides, and I have asked him to wait awhile. I have been glad to see his independence growing. I also have known/known of several others who weaned at six or seven years of age, including my father in law, a respected pastor. I can say with confidence that breastfeeding that long didn't cause any issues, and in fact contributed significantly to overall physical, mental and emotional health.
Many of our friends have had special celebrations, like a cake or weaning party to mark such a special milestone. Years ago, I thought that we would do that. But it seems to be working out as a much quieter, gradual process. I suspect that I won't really know for sure that he has weaned until I look back a few months later. Or, he may decisively determine that he is done. Who knows?
2 comments:
Wow. This will take me some time to process. I can't imagine breastfeeding past the talking stage. Then again, I have to admit I have always hated being touched, so perhaps that contributes to my revulsion at the idea of still theoretically breastfeeding Andy. I appreciate your willingness to address the subject.
Ok, here's my thoughts so far. It was too long to put in the comments lol. :) Thanks for your post.
http://pippiscorner.blogspot.com/2012/01/breastfeeding-past-and-future.html
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